April 1, 2012

The Dying Race




"Being a full- time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love." - Mildred B. Vermont

The only way a woman can make a house a home is by "being in one" "making it one", in the true sense. With the passage of time, there's a rapid change in the priorities of women. More and more women are preferring to be working mothers. A house is just made of bricks, mortar and stone. A home has more to it. :-) Gone are the days when a woman ‘worked’ at her homeNow are the days, when she ‘works’ at an office, and indirectly for her house. 

Women are known to be primarily at the household doing domestic chores, taking good 'personal' care of their children, cooking, taking 'personal' care of the house, her husband, her in-laws and the like. Unlike in these days wherein the most of the women go to work and most of the household work is taken over by maids, cooks and helpers. 

Now, there’s nothing wrong in working and it makes absolutely no sense to be sitting at home with a professional qualification in hand. But when I was a little girl my mom used to be at home throughout looking after my every little need, and she did have friends who were working. But that was a situation I could never imagine for myself. She gave up her job after I was born and I always felt that she has done a great job in bringing me up. Going to work to earn a little more cash for the benefit of the family is good, with an extra income, the child would be provided with a better standard of living, but what the matter of concern here is to me, is that, the child these days is not getting the attention it needs to be given by his/ her mother during it's initial years of development. Maybe the children who have working mothers become more independent and responsible at a young age but do they also become more detached from the family?

Every kid yearns for constant personal attention and motherly love, warmth and care, and they shouldn't be deprived of that, for heck for earning a few more bucks. The whole idea of a working woman is indigestible in my eyes. I think the children whose mothers are homemakers stand out in understanding and perceiving family values in a better way. They are more loving, cultured, behaved, understanding and know the value of a family. They are more sensitive towards their parents. I have a lotta respect for the women who give up their career for upbringing their child in a wholesome way. Nothing to beat the food cooked by the lady of the family, there is a different thing to it. A cook will make the same curry for you, but the major ingredient will be missing in that, LOVE. Yes, I right away differentiate between the two, and so can you! There is a different charm the family has when the woman takes full responsibility of the home, that’s when the house truly becomes a home.


Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother. A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. I have seen my mother doing that many a time. Here I am not questioning the motherliness of a homemaker mom or a working mom, but what I am looking at is the home on the whole. The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.

"Biology is least of what makes someone a mother."- Oprah Winfrey

It’s not wrong to be a working mother, but I would surely say that a woman who is a housewife has an upper hand over the working mother because she spends more time with her family, and that is what is more important, FAMILY. What is more precious than this? I feel sad for the kids who’s mothers are so job- oriented and money- minded, who do not give due attention to their kids.

I would like to appreciate all the women, who sacrifice their career for the bringing up a family, because such a woman understands the true essence and the value of being in one. Hats off to The Dying Race- The Housewives!!!


April 1, 2012

16 comments:

  1. Well, I do not know how much of this can I agree to.. May be my opinion might be biased because my mom works. Homemakers certainly do have an edge but ONLY in the early days of a kid's childhood IMHO.

    Considering the current situations, the kid himself hardly stays at home going around for long hours of school and extra tuition hours. Well, after schooling I think you know the drama, going around the world for engg, pg etc. So considering all this, I think it makes more sense for moms to work. Poor them! Why do they have to sit at homes all alone? :)

    That being said, I do agree that homemakers have to sacrifice a lot dedicating themselves completely to home and family. Kudos to them :)

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  2. Truly a Masterpiece :)...U always amaze me gal. Even Great Napoleon had once said " Give me good mothers,I will give u a good nation.Some of the lines of ur post was just outstanding, my favorite being "Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother".Great work ....and it is more worthy of respect because it is the view of a modern day girl :):)

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  3. Well, I am of the opinion that women should stay at home and take care of their family. But this is a highly debatable subject. Especially post-recession. And from my "research", what I've seen is that some women secretly whine about their job as a "housewife"..Some housewives in their conversations confessed to me that their life is pathetic or "what is the point of doing that course? Now I'm stuck here taking care of the baby. ..My life sucks.." or "My husband won't let me apply for a job" etc etc..Obviously, their husbands are not around to hear this. If they do, its gonna be a chaotic situation that's for sure...:D :D But family is top priority. I wouldn't recommend anyone turning their kids into "NRI babies"..:D :D. I mean, even with parents watching them full time, they are turning into "Page 3 celebrities" so just imagine what would happen if they didn't...lol..Ok, doing a course , having a cool degree is all good but once they make a commitment to start a family and look after them, then all their energy should be directed towards that. Thinking "Oh all my friends in the 'Social Club' are having a job and I don't...I feel so awkward in front of them.." , THAT is not going to help the situation. :D

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  4. No mother will want to leave her child and go for work to earn money for herself . Its only for betterment of her child and their family . She can happily sit at home and enjoy comforts of home and enjoy tv serial if she had the option . But still she makes efforts to manage all . I kind of feel ur post is discrimination towards working mother which isn't fair

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  5. ALOO :: Sit at home and watch TV serials????? This is the impression you have of the women who are homemakers? That's what you think they do?? I'm really sorry about how ignorant you are about the amount of work a mother does at home!! One day try a role- reversal with your wife/ mother. Let her go to office and you take care of the house. Then you'll know how MUCH work has to done to get what the house looks like. With such an attitude, I'm sure your not helping out in the current scenario! And you said, "No mother will want to leave her child and go for work to earn money for herself". I have a question for you. Have you met all the women on Earth for you to vouch for them? I know such mothers okay. And whenever I write about something a lotta thinking goes into it. I have a reason for all my statements. It is outta experience. Many things. So, before you make a loose remark like sitting at home watching TV serials, think again!!!! Anyways, Thanks for dropping by and commenting! Good day!

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  6. ALOO : I don't think there is any discrimination in what she wrote because she specifically wrote a line "It’s not wrong to be a working mother..." so I guess you missed that line or did not read the post fully. And the purpose of a "personal blog" is to express the "personal" opinions of the author of that blog. And obviously, she wouldn't write something like this without thoroughly "researching" about it.

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  7. i hope i can tell one opinion of mine ur post was fabulous u are really a amazing girl ... but really the subject is highly delicate to be one sided :) if we take today women they are given or taken rights offered or they offer back too but doing so they seem to make society highly fragmented :) . some devoid the reality and try to overthrow the basic of culture upholding rights and there are many more who simply make few rules out of their own which is appreciative but often finds trouble to protocols of this society .... take for example a girl in her twenties with far aspirations to do something extraordinary out of her career , life and her parent goes seeking that path and suddenly after few years they find themselves half achieved their goals and one day give up and just get married and then post pregnancy retard themselves to homes due to practical changes in self , attitude and in physical mobility ... wats the point here ? the dying race is not dying but it reigns from time to time ... this is the majority .. a child in its infancy cannot be neglected as it needs that care that will make it highly progressive until its death .... there are few exceptional cases where the women have reached the goals even with practical disturbances in place ... wat abut women who try to take up dreams and in that path find world-ly possesions called love and then divert to newer ever changing goals ? today IT , and ITES has loads of such characters that are highly disgusting to be described yet take pride in saying that they too are comparable to the mothers of households ... funny and sad ... the women at home are truly awesome as they make up men and women of strong character but women in workplace also do contribute the same but contribution as such is very limited ..... it may not mean a life for a women where she alone excelled it means more to the child that was born out of her , the society that respects her and to her self morale that is the highest guarded gift to next generation .....

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  8. isnt a woman supposed to dream .. have some opinions of her own
    a job of her own
    independence
    a mother's motherliness isnt quantitative
    iam raised freely and by different people at different times
    well we both had it differently but that doesnt mean that my culture my behavior is any different than yours
    and as far as habits are concerned even the ones from the strictest homes do wander into the dark side

    4 walls of brick & mortar to be considered a house isnt a mom's sole responsibility its supposed to be a family thing .. all should contribute equally
    if she is being selfish let her be she has every right to be
    becoz before being a mother she was a wife and first she was a girl with ambitions :)

    but u do have a sensible way of putting your point across (pardon me for my grammatical/spelling mistakes)

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  9. Sudarshan Rangarajan :: A woman can very well have big dreams and have opinions of her own, similarly this (post)is my opinion. See Sudarshan, some girls are homely and family oriented even though they might be professionally qualified and some are very career oriented. What I wanted to highlight in the post is that a woman should not be on her way to fulfill her ambitions at the cost of her family. Leave family alone, I'm talking about her own child. Everyone has a lotta independence these days, we are living in modern India and times have changed so there's no question about having no independence.:-)
    Yup everyone doesn't have the same up- bringing but that doesn't mean one is better than the other. Infact that home in which parents are the kids best friends is the best home, irrespective of mother working or not. And yes, it isn't a mom's sole responsibility its supposed to be a family thing, but a mom has a great contribution to it and it makes a big difference bec of the fact that the mother is the primary nurturer of the kid, it does make a big big difference. Well, a mother's nature is selfless and as she grows in her relationships in life from a kid to a lady to a woman to a wife and then a mother, her needs evolve and she automatically becomes giving and her priorities change coz with age and more designations in life comes responsibilities, right?? :-)

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  10. sudarshan rangarajanApril 2, 2012 at 11:06 PM

    there is a middle path too, women who can ably juggle career and family and this kind isnt rare instead its the most common one. the breed of career oriented women is new and rare
    her priorities do change after each new stage but everyones does .. even a guy has to accept the changes
    the ones living in modern India are just a few of us, we account for 5% (acc. to 2009) rest is still not modern
    (grammar mistakes excused pls :P)

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  11. Sudarshan :: Hmmm...Yeah...That's true..Well, the middle path is great. Trying to be in the middle path is awesome but does it really turn out that way?? To maybe just a few. Ably managing everything (EVERYTHING???)..That's GREAT then!! :)) No wonder these women are superwomen! :P Many people just talk about being modern but when it comes down to their own thing they juss dun wanna change. Seen that! :)) True that there are a very few modern in the true sense! I would say westernized! ;)India and Westernization??? Beats me!! :P Again, I hope when you say modern you are not referring to "not modern" as "narrow mindedness" or "backwardness" coz i'll tell ya what everyone has their own thing, juss bec you don't agree to something you can't call em not modern!! Can you define modern for me? I would love to know?!

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  12. Great writing!!
    But i was just thinking in terms of a woman's perspective. and i felt may be a successful woman would be someone who could balance her family life(being a mother, wife, daughter, sister etc) and at the same time also achieve something in her career. Not all women work only for the money. It has a lot more to it.
    Mother is always a mother, whether working or a homemaker. Like already mentioned, some women are very family oriented and some career, but it is the inbuilt nature of any woman, to be a good mother. Nevertheless, i loved the post :) :)

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  13. what can I say, its 8 am and I am reading your blog.

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  14. I still have my 23 yr old friends whining about their mom not being at home when they go from college. How sad!
    On the other hand, there is a need for them to work due to their family conditions.
    Whatever its is, Housewives or Working moms.. mom is a mom.. there will be no diminution in the love she shows for her family. Isn't that enough?! :)

    Very well written divs :)

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  15. I like that you have written on this topic Divs. I also really admire and respect mothers who sacrifice their careers for bringing up their children. But there are some situations where the family cannot survive without a second earning member and in this case I think the children learn to be more independent from a very young age. In all, I think it very difficult to weigh both situations and conclude on which is better but one thing is certain, mothers who stay at home to watch their children grow and are a part of every one of their children's activities are truly to be appreciated. Well written :)

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