July 9, 2011

Baltimore to Bhagalpur

As I walk towards the International Departure, I turn behind, wave and bid him goodbye. He waves back to me. I control my tears; take in a big gulp of sadness and with a deep sigh I continue walking.

I kept walking. I wanted to turn again and see him. But I didn’t.

I checked-in at the airport and collected my boarding pass. I had asked for an aisle seat. After the emigration, I started walking towards Gate 21 to board my flight. Pre-occupied, I forgot to mention my frequent flyer number. I walked all the way back, irritated, because of my stupidity, I got a new boarding pass with my frequent flyer number mentioned on the boarding pass, I started walking towards gate 21, again.

After an hours’ wait at the lounge, I board my flight. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. It was as if time had frozen. It was as if that one hour had sixty deadly minutes which in-turn had three thousand six hundred pricking seconds. My mind was cluttered with morose thoughts. I couldn’t imagine a week away from him, but I couldn’t bring him along with me. I had to leave on a very short notice.

He is my life and I love him more than myself. :-)

As soon as boarding was announced, everyone rushed to the counter. It looked as if it were a, ‘Who gets in first’ race! I waited patiently, for the restless, rather excited idiotic crowd to clear. I boarded the flight, fastened my seat belt, switched off my mobile and took a deep sigh. A few more hours of solitude, mid-air, without him. The very thought was driving me insane. I kept thinking what he would be doing back at home. But I had no choice. Ever since I have been with him, I have never been away from him. I think I need him more than he needs me.

He is my life, my everything! :-)

Boeing 757, Seat C4, Twenty two thousand feet above sea level and the only thing I can think of is him. The craft swayed like a pendulum, due to the turbulence caused by the air-pockets in the clouds. I was scared of heights and confined spaces, and the turbulence scared me even more. I started chanting Hanuman Chalisa. Felt better, but was thinking about him all-the-more.

I tried distracting myself, tried doing the cryptic crossword and the Sudoku, read the comic strips, my horoscope forecast for the month, the weather forecast etc. All my efforts to cheer myself up went in vain. I couldn’t concentrate. I was missing him, a lot.

He is my life, my everything, my Rohit ! :-)

The craft landed in Patna after the jolty journey. The wheels creaked along the runway; it was a horrible landing. After taxing for about fifteen minutes, it came to a halt. I switched on my mobile. Got a ‘Airtel welcomes you to Bihar’ sms :-) People rushed out, ran towards the immigration hall, and then to collect their luggage. I went out at my pace. Patna wasn’t my destination. Bhagalpur was, I had to travel more. Hmmm. *Sigh*

Getting back home in India was unavoidable. There were some legal issues which I had to settle in my home town, Bhagalpur. I had some self-centered, narrow- minded, good-for-nothing, stubborn, irritating, orthodox relatives in town, but they just added to more trouble and misery. My parents were no more. They passed away a year ago. I was better off alone in the city, I did not inform anyone about my coming. I wanted to wrap up my work as soon as possible and get back to him. I had settled abroad after specializing in ‘Psychology’, which was my passion and profession. I admit, I’m one of the very few people who get to have the same profession as their passion. I’m very happy about that. :-D

After five days of running around in the scorching and blistering heat, assimilating the correct documents, following up useless government officials who come to work late and leave before time and keep expecting a bribe every single time, getting their signatures and seals, arghh! Finally I was through with all the work. I was relieved. Phew!

I went to my native temple, sat at my favorite place, meditated for a while, I waited to see the evening aarti. It was very peaceful. I visited the places I had lived during my childhood. The familiar lanes, cinema halls, shops, the big banyan tree, the lucky well, Bhola Ram’s dhaaba, Laljeet’s sweet shop. I was happy to see all these places after so many years. Unfortunately I lost contact with all my friends. I’m not on any social networking sites and I’m bad at maintaining contacts. I’m pretty much of an introvert and I love my privacy. I was hoping to bump into a known face, well, that didn’t happen. I had a lovely day, visiting all these places, but wanted to go back to see him, it was high time I left for Baltimore.

I work in Baltimore since twelve years; live with Rohit, my adopted son.
We have a dog Dora, I found her on the streets, I got her home :-)

I’m a single mom, a spinster, my name is Raagini.
He is my life, my everything, my Rohit, my son :-)

9th July 2011


  1. Omg! Very very profound Divs! Loved it! The unconditional love and affection between a mother and child is insurmountable and I like the way you have expressed such intricate emotions. Your best post till date Divs! Kudos to "Baltimore" btw!;):D

    1. Thanks a lot! I too believe that its my best till date ! :) :) Yeah, Baltimore ;) ;)

  2. Nicely written. All through the post never did I once think that it was her boyfriend. I kinda guessed the ending. I was thinking it might have been her father or brother, apparently it turned out to be her kid. :D

    So beware I think I can read your thoughts :P

    1. Cool ! Hence proved, great minds think alike !! Cheers !!

  3. read the story ....its good but wht is the coonection between the story and u..............
    flow of the story was superb and interesting to read............
    ..i could feel the journey through your lines man......maza aaya

    u r a gr8 story teller tht i wanted to tell you in the first statement itslef but bhuul gaya.......anything will sell if it has a good story and packaged wellll.......ur story flows like music....haha

    like morzat of music ur morzat in writing......ur a writing alchemist

    1. Thanks a lot !! Wow !! 'Mozart in writing' !! Thats a big compliment !! Maybe the only logical connection is that i felt it n wrote it. This post is a mixture of many things, some things about me, somethings maybe i would like to see, somethings totally not about me...maybe somethings i hav indirectly expressed... :) Happy that you liked it !!! I think its the finest n my best post till now !!

  4. One thing I fail to understand, who was this blog all about.. It was, certainly not about you...Was it about Rohit ? was it about Raagini ? was it about the Journey ?? was it about the airplane ?? was it about Bhagalpur ?? where Can't really make out...Or was it about you, simply want to add a new blog to your blogpost ??...I'm not gonna say " well done, nice writing, you did it again ", of course, this is not yours....Albeit, I appreciate your time and effort, for which I rate you ** on the scale of five, but this kind of blog ??, I read it every now and then.. What happened to Divya's creativity ?? has she lost it ???, she is talented....but still, what happened ??..This blog serves no meaning, no purpose.I'd rather prefer reading something that is about you ( in an attempt to know more about you ) or something that imparts knowledge or gives out specific message ( like your previous blog )... I would be lying if I say I didn't like this blog, I did indeed enjoy reading it, but this is something I will not read again..( I must admit, I did read your other blogs more that 3-4 times ).. Looking forward to read your newer blogs.. Good Luck!!!!

    1. I also fail to understand, why is it that you cant understand that this post, 'Baltimore to Bhagalpur', is about the journey of a lady called Raagini, her thought process, its about the person she's missing- her adopted son, Rohit! There are intricate details of her journey in this post! About her flight, about Bhagalpur, about her feelings, about what is going on in her mind, about the love for her son! There is a suspense factor, where i reveal the identity of the lady at the end. And the person she is missing is her son, and not her boyfriend! Thank you so much for your time and effort to comment here. Don't worry about my creativity and talents! I'm blessed with that in loads and its intact! You said, "This blog serves no meaning, no purpose", does this mean that whatever you do in life is with a motive??, can't i write a post for pleasure! Blogging is my hobby! And i'm sharing it with my friends! And thats it !!
      And if i keep writing about myself, it will be no fun. I want to be a versatile blogger. I want to get my hands on everything. Cant just keep writing about myself. That will become dull and drab. That is not what my blog is about. If you are on the lookout for knowledge, the, lemme tell u that, this blog does convey a message about the love a mother has towards her son, that too an ADOPTED SON. Adopting a baby is a very very very noble thing to do. This girl is so self-less that she hasn't married, and has adopted a kid. It is a big deal. This post salutes motherhood. And appreciates the self-less love a mother has towards her child. I think, this is my best post till date! I don't understand what you fail to understand here! Anyways, I hope you like the posts to come!

  5. it seems like u got into the ladies mind and wrote what she feels . excellent imagination and even better way to put it through words . kya baat hain .

    1. As i have said a million times, I have great imaginative skills. And yes, a mothers' love is unconditional. No one elses' can be so.

  6. Very touching ...felt more connected as bhagalpur and patna were mentioned..:)